Organic Beer is Fucking Stupid!

Ok, now that I have that off my chest, let me explain myself to all of those angry treehugers (I get to say this without offense, I grew up in VT).

First off, do not try and say "Cause it tastes better". This is bullshit. I have had non-organic beers that made me cream myself and organics that were as bland as a bud lite. There is no way that you can convince me that it improves overall quality, so do not even try.

Now in order to label a product as "Organic", the product must contain at least 95% organic ingredients. This amount does not include salt or water. That's right! There is no such thing as Organic table salt. Beer is 92% water, give or take a few points based on the style (a lite beer is going to contain more water than a stout). This is the origin of that phrase "drink one, piss two". Manufactures of organic beer are only required to use organic ingredients in about 95% of 8% of the beer, or 7.6% of the bottle of beer. 7.6% of the whole product! If I tried to sell an organic fruit bar, and then told you that it was only 7.6% organic, you would demand your 5$ back.

The ingredients that could be used to make an organic beer are barley, wheat, hops, adjuncts (like corn or rice) and any specialties ingredients (like cherries in a cherry stout). Most of these ingredients are easy to produce organically, save one. Hops are really hard to source as the hop bine (it is a bine and not a vine) and the hop flower are susceptible to a wide array of attacks from bacterias, fungi, and viruses. It is unfortunate that one of the key components of beer is so finicky.

And what about water? As it is 92% of the product, shouldn't we be using the best fucking water on the planet? If a manufacturer is creating an organic beer, shouldn't there be some regulation on the main ingredient? I can create a beer that is made of organic barley, non-organic hops, and water from the east river and I can still slap an organic label on the beer. Why isn't there a demand that all organic beers use triple purified, charcoal filtered, glacier spring water? If the main ingredient isn't being regulated, can we really have an discussion on how it will/won't benefit our environement and health?

My main question in this organic beer revolution is from where are we going to source all these organic ingredients? In order to maintain current output without using pesticides, we will need to increase farm land, which destroys habitats and burns more fossil fuels as there is more land to work. Importing organic hops from New Zealand, one of the few places that does not have the same fungal issues as North America, will burn tons more fossil fuels, while raising beer prices dramatically. I am not saying that I want non-organic products, I am just being realistic. Does the use of organic ingredients in 7.6% of a product really improve our environment or have that dramatic of an impact on our bodies?

Instead of slapping the Organic symbol on everything, I would prefer to see breweries adopt other environmentally sound practices. Already, many breweries are shining stars of the recycle, reuse, renew concept. Spent grains are used as feed for livestock, the brewing process generates more yeast than the brewery can use (homebrewers, hit you your local brewer for some yeasty action), brewing water is heated via the last batch's heat during the wort chilling process, and on and on... There are some areas that breweries can improve on, such as basic green building practices, the use of alternate sources of electricity (Brooklyn Brewery uses wind power), cleaning and the reuse of run off water for toilets, watering the breweries grounds or even to help power the brewery. As for what you can do to get a more environmentally-sound beer? Restart the East/West coast rivalry. If you live on the East coast, buy only East coast beer and for you west coasters, buy West. Basically, buy more locally produced beers and shun as much imported beer as possible. We burn fossil fuels to bring that German Octoberfest to your local shop. Instead, go to your local brewery or beer shop and see if they will sell growlers ( for Park Slope, Bierkraft, Carol Gardens, American Beer Distributors, elsewhere try The Beer Mapping Project). That way you are buying local, buying in bulk, and reusing the glass growler. These are much more real than buying a bottle that charges you more cause it sports an organic symbol on it's label.

I am all for eating healthy products and supporting local producers, but please people USE YOUR HEAD! Christ, if Anheuser - Busch has jumped on this bandwagon, you know it has nothing to do with producing a good beer or a better environment. It is more about commanding a higher price for low cost product, all while trying to compete with the swell of micro breweries. As more companies jump on the organic train, my fear is that the term will be diminished to the "All Natural" or "Fresh" slogans of yesteryear. So please, think about this stuff. Ask yourself: are you popping open an organic beer cause it is better for the environment, better for your body (remember now, you are drinking beer), or are you drinking that organic beer because it makes you feel better about yourself, a fact of which many marketers are very aware and "could" be exploiting.